Attention: The following blog post might not make much sense to those who aren’t familiar with both television and the current state of the dairy industry in the USA.

I woke up rather early this morning (about 10am!) and was watching a bit of TV. I caught something on The History Channel about the USA’s invasion of Panama which was rather interesting, and then I flipped over to TBS to watch Becker.

I didn’t watch Becker while it was in production, and I’m really rather sorry for that. It’s one of the funniest sitcoms I’ve ever seen, and I’d go so far as to put it in the same category as Night Court.

Now, for those that don’t know, I live in Wisconsin. Wisconsin’s slogan is “America’s Dairyland”, and with good reason. Wisconsinites are often referred to as “cheeseheads”, and with good reason, we’re proud of our dairy industry here.

Now, on to the reason why I feel dirty.

While I was watching Becker, a commercial came on. A few bulls (male cows) kicked a football into the female’s side of the pasture. Hilarity doth ensues. I thought the commercial was rather cute, and I quite enjoyed it… Until The end came around.

“Great Cheese comes from happy cows, happy cows come from California”.

I feel dirty.

Now, some people in the states might know that California currently holds the title as the state that produces the most milk in the country. Why? Simple. The state is almost 3 times the size of Wisconsin. More room for cows. A few years back there were even demands from Californians that Wisconsin remove the “America’s Dairyland” slogan from our license plates.

Califorina is nearly 3 times the size of Wisconsin, and they don’t produce that much more milk than we do. Take away even 1/2 of the land area of California due to indadequate conditions (Cities, desert, etc.) and it’s still larger. Califorina produces more milk, simply because they have more area to put cows. Now they’re targeting our cheese industry.

I’ve had Cheese from California, and it’s nothing to write home about. It wasn’t as bad as the “cheese” I once had in Colorado, but that’s an entirely different story. I know people that travel over a thousand miles just to get Wisconsin cheese. It’s not enough that Califorina holds the current milk producing title, now they’re targeting our cheese producing title too. I know that you’d never, EVER see a Californian wearing a cheese-hat at a Raiders game, they’re too concerned that their feathered, highlighted hair might get messed up.

California, I hope the “big one” hits, and that you fall into the ocean never to be seen again. We will then sing songs of the mythical “Californtis” that was swallowed by the sea. You’ve done some real stupid things over the past few years, electing an Austrian as governor was just the start.

One thing I know, we don’t have to spend millions on an advertising campaign to tell people that good cheese comes from Wisconsin, everyone already knows it. You may be able to take the quantity title away, but you’ll never beat the quality.